Tired

 

There's a whole in my heart...

My soul... is bleeding...

I need to free...my mind...

And see what...I'm feeling

Cause Lord knows, Lord knows,

I'm......

I’m tired

~ Kelly Price – Tired

Man what I wouldn’t have done for one more day added to this weekend. I am physically and emotionally TIRED. I’m sleepy. My eyeballs hurt. I tried to go to bed early but that didn’t happen so I watched DVR’d shows. Next thing I know, it’s midnight. Then…well I’ll just say I probably didn’t go to sleep until sometime after three…and now I’m paying for it.  

They say you learn something new every day; well they aren’t ever lying about that one. I am learning and experiencing a new set of emotions and feelings. I wonder if this is similar to what a child goes through as they are learning what emotions are, how to identify them, what they feel like, and how to express them. I understand what angry, sad and depressed feel like but I haven’t been quite able to put my finger on this one. All I keep coming up with are numb, confused, bewildered, and perplexed but I’m sure there has to be a term to describe this. 

Surprisingly, I don’t feel as hurt as I thought I would. I’m also not as pissed off as I thought I would be. Maybe this is part of my confusion. I know there has to be a reason for my daughter to have changed so drastically, done so poorly last semester, and is now denying me like Judas did Jesus.  This is just not linear, I can’t make the connection. I’ve been trying to do root-cause analysis and coming up with nothing. Maybe that is why I can’t label how I feel because there is so much I don’t know that I’m waiting to find out.  

*shug* I just know I’m sleepy as heck and would love to curl up in my bed w/ my sweet Chloee muffin.

 

Caught someone knocked out on my pillow!

 

Funk-O-Meter = 4

Days Without 'Cupcake' = 0!