Spidey Senses

“Your baby will always be your baby, even if they have grey hair.” ~ Unknown

In the middle of being enraged (see yesterday's post), a voice inside told me to stop and look at the fact everything changed drastically and suddenly. My gut told me something happened and to ask my daughter if she was ok.

After I finished assessing my daughter’s mental state I thought about the times I screwed up and how much I wished someone would have been there for me. I came to the conclusion being mad wasn't productive and wouldn't help the situation. Remaining angry would just be emotionally draining and waste time that could be used fixing the problem while it’s still in a fixable state.

As I started helping her come up with resolutions I felt more and more compassionate to the point I had to evaluate what was happening inside.  Honestly, I was confused. Then it came to me, I was feeling what I felt when she was a baby, would cry out, and I would desire to pick her up to soothe her. Although my daughter is an adult, I wanted to pick her up and put her in my lap to make it all better; put a Band-Aid on her boo boo.

Having had my daughter at such a young age, I often felt disconnected or like my mommy gene was broken. Due to life circumstances, we lived apart for a while when she was small or with other relatives. Sometimes I felt more like we were sisters than mother and daughter. I would watch other people with their children and think they had a link with their offspring I didn’t share with mine. Moments like this reassure me that I do have mommy instincts and am forever joined with my baby.

…this is parenting.

Funk-O-Meter = 3.5