Pieces of Me

“All the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put Humpty together again. “ ~ Humpty Dumpty nursery rhyme

Rebuilding is not an easy or fun process. In order to rebuild something, it has to be torn down from its current state to reconstruct a new, renovated form.  The process is messy, time consuming and usually expensive. The rebuilding of one’s self is comparably a similar process. You have to peer inside through the lens of honesty to dig out traits that shouldn’t be there and recognize characteristics that are missing.

During my rebuilding process, I’ve realized some hideous, truths. It seems I’ve blamed myself for things that were not of my doing and wasn’t accepting responsibility for those that were. One of the things I figured out I was accountable for were the portions of me I divvied out. I used to blame those that possessed the missing pieces of my essence but these pieces of me aren’t able to be stolen; they can only be bequeathed. Some days I wish I could go knock on the doors of all those I gave myself away to and ask, “Hi, I don’t know if you remember me but can you return to me the shards of my soul I gave you in error? Thanks!”

Other traits I seem to have simply lost along the way. I recently dispatched missing posters and put an ad on the back of some milk cartons to see if I can find them. I’ll let you know how it goes. I reflect back on aspects I admired about myself that came up missing and I now strive to discover them again.

Now the remnants that I was straight up robbed of, I’m taking back! Too long I held myself responsible for situations out of my control and circumstances that were not my responsibility. No more. I have started giving these articles back to those they belong to and reclaiming the innocence, sanity, peace, and esteem I was pickpocketed of. I’ve filed a police report, dusted for prints, and identified the perpetrators. They will be prosecuted.

I’m actively collecting all pieces of me to assemble an even better version than what stood before. I know the cost will be high to complete my renovation project but you get what you pay for; and I’m sparing no expense. I’m taking back the parts of me I gave away, lost along the way, or had taken from me. I am putting C. Love back together again!

Funk-O-Meter = 3.5

Days Without 'Cupcake' = 0 (...don't judge me)