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“If loving you is
wrong, I don’t wanna be right.” ~ Luther Ingram
It’s interesting to me how we come into this world blank
slates and each end up a different picture depending on our family,
geographical location and other factors that socially construct us. One of the
first words I think we learn as infants is ‘no’. As babies begin to crawl and put things in
their mouths they shouldn’t we tell them no. When they try and do something
that will put them in harm’s way, again, we tell them no. We are teaching them
right from wrong. You praise and reward the good behavior so the child will
repeat it and shun the bad behavior in an effort to prevent them from doing it
again. The carrot and the stick…but something happens.
I’m unsure what age it starts happening or how one comes to
feel like this, but at some point saying no can make the child more intrigued
and determined to do or have what they were told no about. Something shifts
from the desire to please the parents and do what is good and rewarded to
having a yearning for what you are being denied.
As adults, well I can’t speak for all adults so I’ll just
speak for me. At times, I have found it a difficult task to obey the no’s I
tell myself. I’m not sure if it is a lack of discipline problem, temptation, greed
and/or any of the other 7 Deadly Sins. Have you ever been lying in the bed and
had the thoughts:
 |
| Yummy Deliciousness! |
“I want a cupcake.”
“There are cupcakes in the kitchen”
“Maybe I should go get one.”
“NO! You don’t need a friggin’ cupcake this late! Go to bed!”
“Hmmm…the craving isn’t going away, maybe I’ll just eat
half.”
“Damn this is good!”
“I might as well eat the other half”
Then comes the “stick” or self-reprimand:
“Why did you do that!”
“In the morning when your pants don’t fit and you feel like
your behind is two big cinnabuns bouncing around you are going to regret eating
that cupcake.”
“You didn’t even work out today.”
Maybe it’s just me but this scenario happens all too
frequently, and not just with cupcakes. Life is full of proverbial cupcakes so
you can replace that word with whatever it is you feel powerless to resist. How do we reprogram ourselves to obey and know that NO means No? What can we do
to overcome the cravings and temptation that seem to take control over our
faculties to the point we can’t make rational decisions? The thought just
popped in my head about infidelity. They know it’s wrong and understand the
possible consequences of the action including but not limited to pregnancy,
STDs, getting caught, half or in Vanessa Bryant’s case $75mil (“trick you wasn’t
w/ me shootin’ in the gym!”).
Why do we do it? Why do we dive head first into the pool
of iniquity knowing there’s no water in the bottom? Is it just man’s natural
inclination to sin, and miss the mark? Well I’m endeavoring to deal
with one demon cupcake in my life. Someone told me this morning, "Guilt is
an invitation to change the choices you've made." Right now, on July
24, 2012, I accept the invitation. Along w/ a Funk-O-Meter, we will have a Days
Without ‘Cupcake’ count as a daily reminder to myself that No means No and the
cupcake is bad for me.
Funk-O-Meter = 3.5
Days Without 'Cupcake' = 1
Great. Now I feel guilty for eating that honey bun last night. But in my defense it had been YEARS since I had a honey bun.
ReplyDeleteYep. We've ALL got cake in our lives somewhere. Damn Duncan Hines for being so moist and delicious, with its creamy, delectable icing. Nom nom nom.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, maybe if you consult your favorite chef, he can help you come up with a new recipe. Maybe you can alter the ingredients list, perhaps using applesauce in place of sugar or whatever, you won't feel as guilty.
Although I wish we could use a different metaphor (because now I want a ccupcake), I think it comes down to renewing our mind with the truth, forgiving and releasing ourselves from guilt, and being careful of things that push us towards what we don't need at the time.
ReplyDelete