I Like It...But I Don't Need It

“Yes I like it

 But I don't need it

'Cause I like it

 Don't mean I need it 

I like the way you move

I like the way you talk

You have such a sweet way

I like to spend my days

With you always the same

Such sweet consistency

But it's cool don't mess with it

Leave it this the way it is 

Baby with you it's quite alright

So much better than it’s been with the other guys

But I don't need a label just leave it alone

Don't wanna tie you down you're free to go  

Yes I like it

But I don't need it

I don't wanna be your girlfriend

'Cause I like it

Don't mean I need it

I don't wanna be your girlfriend  

Ooh yeah its mighty good

No need for me to front

 I can separate the two

A boyfriend ain't what I want

Now we can kick it baby

Just like the way we've been

I just need to be free

Don't need you to rescue me 

No no not me

Don't wanna be in love

I just wanna be single and fabulous

Fine independent women

It's my time

The last thing on my mind

Is committing to some guy

Too much that I need to do

And I'm sorry to say but the list don't include you

And don't you say I didn't tell you what it was at first

Look at the situation

Take it for what its worth 

Baby with you it's quite alright

So much better than it’s been with the other guys

But I don't need a label just leave it alone

Don't wanna tie you down you're free to go  

Yes I like it

But I don't need it

I don't wanna be your girlfriend

'Cause I like it

Don't mean I need it

I don't wanna be your girlfriend”  

~Vivian Green – I LikeIt (But I Don’t Need It)

 

 

Recently, I had a conversation with Dr. P and she asked me a question to which my answer surprised ME. Of course she expected my response to be what it was and asked me to prove a point. She started by pointing out a few years back when I met her, I was in a tizzy and concerned with running out of time. I felt like someone had put a huge “clock” around my neck and the end of my life was quickly approaching. I just knew because I was old and decrepit,  no one was going to want  to marry me…well no one I would want to be married to would want to marry me.   

Well we were chatting about some other random life stuff, nothing sad or heavy when out of the blue: 

Dr. P: “With your recent birthday and more time passing, do you still feel like you are running out of time and won’t end up married?”  

Me: “No.”  

Dr. P: “Are you still concerned with whether or not you will ever be married?”  

Me: “No.”  

I sat there. Puzzled. I answered her questions immediately, but I meant what I said. I wasn't confused. I truly, earnestly and sincerely am not concerned about that at the moment. I can’t even remember the last time I spent (since January) pondering, worrying, wondering what my fate would be in regards to marriage. Hmmmm, what happened? I told her that I wasn’t just saying that and meant it. That I wasn’t concerned with any of that at present and she said she knew, which was why she asked. Dr P said she wanted to point out that as I’ve evolved and become more comfortable and sure of who I am, the less I have been anxious about whether or not anyone else would want to “keep me.”   

Ironically…and we know I don’t believe anything happens by chance…the song above came up in the shuffle when I was on my way home. I ran it back. Vivian said that! I like it…but I don’t need it. 'Cause I like it, don't mean that I need it! I started thinking about the things Dr. P pointed out and analyzing what changed in me or why I saw things differently. What differed is how I see C. Love and who I see myself to be. I’d subscribed to the bullshit bulletin I was being read that said I wasn’t a spring chicken anymore and if I didn’t hurry up and land a good catch, no one would want to fry an old hen. As I’ve found solace in the coolness of being me, my motivation and vantage point has drastically shifted.   

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I don’t ever want to be married or be in THE RIGHT relationship, I’m just saying that isn’t my primary point of trepidation right now. I actually like my life; aside from all of the cockamamie health attacks that is. I’m excited to see what the future has for me as an individual and reaching my lofty goals of fabulousness!  I’m kinda enjoying jet setting, self-discovery and the medicinal laughter that comes from spending quality time with my real friends. “No new friends, n@#$ we don’t feel that! F@%k a fake friend, where you real friends at?” And the Real Friends' Club meeting minutes from this weekend specifically state that mantra is especially applicable when it comes to men hehehe!!!

Days Until Graduation: 80
Remaining Class Days: 20 ...but we are allowed two absences per class per semester, which means Nicki Flash only has 16 classes left lmao!!