Chickens Come Home To Roost

“Shit. Damn. Mother fucker.” – D. Angelo

I am sitting here waiting for it to hit me; waiting to feel bad for firing an associate in the middle of what America professes to be a recession. It isn’t coming. I feel like Cameron Diaz in The Holiday when she can’t cry when she breaks up and keeps trying to force the tears to come. Have I turned into Scrooge? What’s next? Hiding dentures from old ladies running down kindergarteners in cross walks? Where is the compassion my gifts test said ranked number one?

So I liked him. I really liked him. He was funny, cool and the best freakin’ cook in the cafeteria. No one can touch his curly fries, grilled cheese or fried egg sandwiches. That Friday morning I came in and he’d fried up pork chops to go w/ the eggs…mmm mmm mmmmm!! (only on free days Cara, I promise!!!!) He was warned though. He knew they were looking for a reason, I told him time and time again do not give them any opportunity if you really want your job and what did he do…not once but two twice basically spit in their faces.

Sitting there looking him in the eye telling him I was terminating his employment in accordance w/ policy yatta yatta and blah blah blah, he looked remorseful. He tried to argue. Before delivering, I researched to find out if there was ANY way around this but in my digging, it became apparent that this should have happened 6 months ago. He’d been given 7.5 second chances.

Why can’t I be that direct and to the point in my own life? When wearing this HR badge, there is no wavering in my voice or delivery. I don’t back peddle or change my mind. I look at the law and enforce it w/o question. Why can’t I do that in my personal relationships? I listen to Dr. Laura on the regular and hear her say things so bluntly and she’s right; if we would just do what we know to be right regardless of how hard it is, our lives wouldn’t be so complicated. Why do I continue to speed when I know if I get stopped, I've already taken defensive driving this year and a ticket is NOT in my budget? Why can’t I just tell that stalker when they ask why I’m avoiding them that there is no way on God’s green earth (or whatever color it is on that given day) that you and I will ever be? Or answer the phone instead of hitting ignore when I don’t want to answer to the questions I know await on the other end?

Why didn't he heed my many warnings? I basically pleaded w/ him to walk the line and he wanted to dance a jig…danced his ass right out of a job. I don’t feel bad, I went above and beyond to direct, coach and pretty much kicked him in the pants on numerous occasions. Maybe I don’t feel bad because I kinda feel like he spit in my face too. I know I won’t be renewing the personalized plates in October, don’t need the enemies I seem to make regularly at work able to pick out my car so easily LOL!!!

If only we would deal with things head on, not avoid the hard stuff, do what we know to be right and handle our biz…square biz that iz

…we wouldn’t have to figure out what to do when our chickens come home to roost.